suddenlysinglewomen

Becoming the best version of yourself

Here’s To Being $$ Smart!

When I was married, I got 0% input on our financial decisions.  When I got divorced I was terrified I’d be able (read “smart enough”) to take care of decisions involving money and investments.

I found some amazing financial advisors, and this is one of their articles that they share with their clients.  Read and think about your situation – are you savvy with your financial future?

“When it comes to personal finance, women tend to downplay their abilities—and often delegate control. Yet even if they’re not ready, they’re likely to be primary financial decision makers at some point in their lives. Here’s a guide to getting more engaged.”

https://www.alliancebernstein.com/sites/library/women-building-wealth-five-things-you-need-to-know.htm?mid=bmi&seg=66

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The Two “B’s” . . .

Do I have you thinking??  What do you think the two “B’s” are?

Breakfast or Brunch?

Bats and Balls?

Bend or Break?

Biggio and Bagwell?  (OK, that’s only for real baseball fans!)

OK, I’ll stop now!  : -)  For the purposes of this post, my two “B’s” are “better” and “bitter“.

I’ve covered this before, but a recent incident brought it back in memory and it’s OK to sometimes rehash a thought.  With the exception on one little letter, which one are you?  How can changing that one little letter make you a happier person?

No matter if you started following this post because of your own divorce, or you just signed up to make me feel better (and hopefully yourself!), this covers everyone.

Sometimes in those critical moments of making a decision on how to react to a situation, you come to a crossroads, a fork in the path.  You make a choice and it can either make you a happier person, or doubt can lead you to falter, or down a darker pathway.

“The circumstances of life either shrink or stretch your faith.  Either you get better or you get bitter.  The choice is yours.”

I hope that in life, I have made the “better” choices, because choosing to be bitter only hurts you!  In closing, take heart in the positiveness of this old gospel banner:

Doubt see the obstacles.

Faith sees the way.

Doubt sees the darkest night.

Faith sees the way.

Doubt dreads to take a step.

Faith soars on high.

Doubt questions, “Who believes?”

Faith answers, “I”

 

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Little Thought, Big Message –

I’m lucky in that I have friends in all age ranges!  You might think that wisdom comes mostly from those who have “lived” life – not always!

I borrow this from the Facebook post of one of the “youngsters” I’m privileged to know.  She’s somewhere in the age range of “25”, but otherwise very worldly in her thoughts.  Not sure where she borrowed this from, but when I read it, I knew it had to be shared with you all.

“Everybody wants happiness, nobody wants pain,

But you can’t have a rainbow without a little rain.”

Few words, huge message!

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A Pearl Of Wisdom Heard Recently At A Luncheon –

When looking for motivation to achieve a difficult task, the speaker relayed what her husband always told her:

“Gaining an inch is a cinch, gaining a yard is hard”

So the lesson?  Baby steps!

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9) Smiles Are Contagious

‘Nuff said!

: -)

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8) Positive Thoughts Create Positive Things

Following on the heels of Happiness comes from within, is today’s thought tickle!

Isn’t this just one of those things that sounds so obvious that you wonder why it has to be pointed out?

Isn’t it sad that it has to be?

Especially over the past couple of years in our country, I’ve never seen such animosity and divide.  No one can agree on anything.  What ever happened to my Mother’s old saying, “You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar”?  These days if you’re a fly, you’re just gonna get squashed.

The power of positive thinking can create great change now when we need it most.  Where can it start?  With the person in the mirror!

Go download the John Lennon song “Imagine” and then . . . imagine being positive with everyone you encounter today.

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7) Happiness Is Found Within

I’ve known this one a long time – but it doesn’t make it any easier to accomplish.

I guess I was really a witness to this in my marriage.  When things start to go south, there’s alot of blame being hurled around.  One of those accusations???  “I’m not happy anymore, you don’t make me happy.”

You wanna scream – “It’s not my job!”    But it also isn’t that easy.

In any relationship, you certainly want to do nice things for the other person, to put a smile on their face, to show your love, that you care, that they are important to you.  However, what if that person is so miserable, and can’t see that it starts with him or her?  They may toss your kindness and love right back in your face.  How does that make you feel?

Like not trying anymore.  And so the relationship break down begins.

Don’t let their misery bring you down – let’s hope your happiness is infectious.  Let’s hope that some day they understand that “Happiness Is Found Within”!

 

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Part Two – – –

Continuing on from the Book:

“Lord, Change My Attitude Before It’s Too Late”

OK – tell the truth, have you been thinking of the things you’re grateful/thankful for?  Hope so!

Here’s the second installment!

Replace a Covetous Attitude with an Attitude of Contentment!

Covet, kind of an old fashioned word.  Synonymous with envy?  I googled it and found this:

“Covetous, greedy, acquisitive, grasping, avaricious mean having or showing a strong desire for especially material possessions.  Covetous implies inordinate desire often for another’s possessions.”

Strong words – makes me picture a snarling and drooling wild hound.  You get the drift though.  It’s never being happy with what you have.  It’s a “have not’s” kind of jealousy of the “have’s”.  I admit that I sometimes used to covet the loving relationships that some of my friends have with their husbands or significant others.  Does that make me a bad person?  No, probably just makes me a “real” person.  It also doesn’t get me anywhere toward the goal of being a happy person.

Contentment with what you have is something I think you acquire the older and wiser you get.  You learn that “things” don’t make you happy.  You learn that “people” don’t have the responsibility to make you happy.  YOU make you happy.

Sure, who doesn’t want to get that new pair of shoes you saw in the magazine, but when you have plenty of shoes already – shouldn’t you be content?  Looking around the world today, I’m often reminded of just how content I should be with the freedoms of this country, the friends and family who care for me, the pantry and fridge that are full of nutrition for my body, the resources that allow me to pay my bills and have a roof over my head, the nature that is food for my soul.

It’s not quite as fun as High School graduation was, but I can say that I have graduated.  I can feel the contentment settle over me every day now.  I may not have chosen the status of divorced single woman of a “certain” age approaching the age medicare – but it gave me the opportunity to learn how to be a content woman – and that’s worth all the tea in China!

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Living Around Unhealthy People?

We’ve all heard the term:  narcissist.   I never really knew what it meant exactly until I looked it up after I heard it used in a conversation one day.  Boy did it strike a chord.  Read this article below and if you have one of these people around you?  Beware.  Do not let them suck the air out of your life.

Whether you think it’s just a behavior or something diagnosable matters not.  It’s not healthy to act this way, or be around someone who does.  From the childhood playground bully, to the adult trying to manipulate you at work, in your social circle or even your own family.

You cannot be expected to change another person’s behavior, but you can change yours and how you deal with theirs.  Thanks to my GF for sharing this with me, and helping me understand the definition.

https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/3842/deal-narcissist-method-guaranteed-work/?c=SA

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As The Holidays Approach – Some Good Thoughts!

Whether you’re ready for them or not, the retail establishment has gotten ready for them!  What’s that you say?  “The Holidaze”!!  When I read my friend’s blog about being “prepared”, it made so much sense that I had to share.

This will be a leaner Christmas for me this year – by choice.  And no – I wish I meant my waistline, LOL!!  It’s time for me to remember the “reason for the season” and make some cut backs.  Well .  .  . OK, maybe not for the Grandkids, but for years I’ve gone a bit overboard just because I love giving.

Maybe it’s time to give more of “myself”, than purchased products to wrap and deliver.  It won’t be an easy transition, because I love coming up with surprise gifts that aren’t on the “wish list”. I love wrapping, and tagging, and arranging under the tree till there are so many boxes you have a hard time walking around them to get to the back door.

Whatever the holidaze bring to you and yours, please enjoy the shared link below with some really great ideas!  And may this festive time of the year bring you closer to those you love and cherish.

http://us12.forward-to-friend.com/forward/show?u=2faa118cd9fe72d8634827528&id=5bd1ba53b7

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