suddenlysinglewomen

Surviving the unwanted divorce

Family . . . ‘Nuff Said

I grew up in a fairly small family, all things considered.  Mother, Father, brother and me.  My parents were older when they married (thanks to WWII and Korea), so I really only ever had one grandparent that I remember well.  My brother never married and we’re not that close.

My father’s sister never married, so not alot of aunts, uncles, cousins to speak of on the paternal side.  My mother’s siblings did marry and have kids but we never really saw them.  My ex had siblings that married, had kids, and now those kids are having kids.  As with most ex situations, for the most part post divorce, they moved on.  There are a few exceptions, but not many.

Suffice to say when I refer to my “family”, it’s mostly my mother, my sons and their wives, and three grandchildren.   At 98, my mother doesn’t travel any more, sadly we’re not in the same town.  My sons lives are full of their wives, jobs and children now.  It’s a weird ‘in the middle” place that I find myself.

The life plan had been to be happily approaching retirement at this age, and exploring the world again as it started when first married – “on our own”.  That plan left me ten years ago.  So being “in the middle” alone is kinda weird . . . and at times lonely.

To toss around some grammar here, I no longer seem to have either affect or effect on their decisions or their daily lives.  That is their choice.  I am no longer necessarily “necessary”.  Ours is not a “Matriarchal” family set up.  I am on the outside looking in through their bubble.  They are happy in their bubble, so when I saw this post above, it put into words what I was feeling.

I have to love them “exactly as they are now”.  To wish otherwise gains nothing.  I pray nightly for my family generation ahead of me, and behind me.   We all bring value to this world.

 

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Approaching the Weekend – – –

I recently had lunch with a new friend, whom I met at my book signing party last year!  We connected through “social media”, and have subsequently found that we have much in common.  It doesn’t hurt that she feeds my ego by telling me how important my book is, and can be, to women.

SCORE!!

She gives it to her clients as a post divorce tool; she specializes in women being financially savvy when they find themselves “suddenly single” after divorce, or even in the case of the death of a spouse.

While she still explores the “hope” of “happily ever after” through dating, I expressed my willingness to “throw in the towel”.  I applaud her for sticking with it, and admit that the occasional hand-holding, hug, and dinner conversation are things that I still long for.  But how do your find that?

Not sure, but in the mean time, when this pic turned up on my FB feed, I took it as a sign . . . that for the mean time . . . it’s OK learning to be alone.  After all, what man is going to let me obsess over The Voice and it’s Finale?

Go Team Lauren!!   : -)

 

 

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Happy Mother’s Day Weekend!

Thought this was pretty adorable.  And since I don’t really have any plans solidified for Sunday, Mother’s Day, it seemed a fun pic to share with you all.

I am a Mother, twice over, but doesn’t look like there are any plans afoot so I’ll come up with something fun on my own, or with others.  I’m lucky in that my Mother is still alive, and at 98, still a pretty cool mom to be around.  She gets a bit forgetful, buy hey – she’s earned the right.

She taught me alot through the years, and though we won’t be in the same city this year like we were last year, she was thrilled with the card I sent her because if was full of photos of her great grand children – “3”!!!  Mic drop – – – my job here is done!!   I need do nothing else because she is one happy Mother with new photos to show off.

You may not be a Mother, or you may have lost your own Mother, and this day may not bring you joy – and for that I’m sorry, and am sending you a cyber hug!  I think of all the Mothers out there who have lost children through drugs, or reckless driving, or school shootings, or war, or disease – how hopeless they must feel on this day, and I send them my prayers.

It may be classified as a “Hallmark” holiday, but it still means something to me.  Being a Mother is one of the toughest, and most unappreciated jobs around.  So give a Mother a hug this weekend.  She may really need it more than she shows, or more than you know.

A hug is an OK thing to be premeditated!

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The Cozy Life – Book Review

A feel good for the weekend!! Happy reading!!

The Book Review Directory

the-cozy-life

The Cozy Life is a cute, short book about the concept/feeling of hygge and how to bring it into your life.

Note: I’m NOT sponsored to write this review, I just really loved this book

I found out about hygge through a random news article my sister-in -law posted to Facebook a few weeks ago. I fell in love with the idea and immediately began researching it online. One of the first things I found was this book, and since the price was amazing ($4!) I bought and devoured it in only a couple hours!

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