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Surviving the unwanted divorce

Complaining – It’s Everywhere . . .

Recently I wrote about changing your attitudes, being more positive!  Safe to say, I have less than positive feelings about complaining!

People who complain alot – do they really think that’s going to change anything?  I’ve admitted in the past that I used to REALLY complain about bad drivers.  EGAD – where are these people from?  But I have made a concerted effort lately to not let it rattle me as much.

(Is that called “practice what you preach”?)

Are you hurting the other person?  Nope.  Are you changing the other person’s behavior?  Most likely not.  Complaining hurts me; it leads to anger, headaches, bitterness, negativity, raised blood pressure, and I’m pretty sure my eyes cross and I get those frown wrinkles between my brows.  Botox anyone?

I found a definition of the action:  “Complaining is expressing dissatisfaction with a circumstance that is not wrong and about which I’m doing nothing to correct.”

Just because it’s wrong in my opinion, does it necessarily make it wrong?  Deep thoughts to leave you with:

Criticism involves people; complaining involves circumstances.”

In the season of Thanksgiving, definitely something to be aware of as we go about our busy daily lives.

 

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Giving Thanks For All Of You!

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Thought For The Day (and always):

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Some Patterns Are Good . . . Others? Not So Much

I’m a “former” teacher.  I was always looking for patterns of good behavior.  I rewarded that good behavior, did the same as a mother when my sons were young.  The ol’ saying you can catch alot more flies with honey than vinegar was alive and well growing up in my house.

Don’t get me wrong, bad behavior was dealt with, I didn’t just ignore it, but I really really searched out the positive to draw attention to.

A book I completed this summer really had me focusing on attitudes, and how pervasive they are in our lives – both yours, and those around you.  One of the sub-topics in the book was:

“Attitudes are patterns of thinking formed over a long period of time.”

Could it be that those same attitudes are learned by mimicking those people we are around the most?

If you exhibit good behavior, and surround yourself with those who also show good behavior, does it then become a pattern of life?  Wouldn’t that be nice?

As I read in this book:

“Our attitudes are patterns of thinking – formed over a long period of time.  Wrong attitudes are hard to change because they are habitual, harmful ways of thinking about life and circumstances.  Patterns of thinking are so deeply ingrained in our hearts that we hardly even notice them.  We get so used to reacting a certain way that our choices become automatic, and in time we cease to see them as actual choices.  We feel like we are trapped, but we are not.  Tragically, the consequences are also automatic, and that is the cycle that we are trying to break.”

Thing is, we may have a bad attitude, we may be surrounded by alot of bad attitude, but we can change it.   The author offered this:  “You can’t change an attitude until you admit you chose it. But if you’re willing to say, “I choose my attitude,” then a different choice becomes your option.  By admitting you made the choice, you put yourself in a position to make a different choice next time.”

There has been SOOOOO very much negativity in our country over the past year.    If these people were my students, I’d be bald by now from pulling my hair out looking for the positive behaviors to reward.  At least I know I can own my behavior, and change it if need be.

Can you share a good attitude today . . . and make it a pattern?

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