suddenlysinglewomen

Becoming the best version of yourself

Ahhhh – Summertime, Summertime, Sum Sum Summertime!

(hopefully the tune hit your brain, LOL??)

One thing the start of the pandemic, the shutdowns, etc did for many was to help them clear all their “lists” of things to watch on every TV watching service available.

Whether it’s a DVR, a streaming service, a Netflix DVD – we were watching a multitude of things to fill the time.  Back in January it was something happening elsewhere.   Then it hit here.  What do you do when you hunker down?

TV programming!

I jotted down this from one of the many shows I watched, then forgot about it.   I uncovered it the other day and remembered I wanted to share it.   It made me chuckle.   We all need a good chuckle every now and again, right?

Not saying this is how you should approach life, but hey – if the shoe fits . . . . ?

“Not dealing with things is my preferred way of dealing with things”!

Wish I could remember which show I heard it on, I watched so many but there you have it.   Hope it brought a slight chuckle to you today.  (I think the heat is getting to me!)

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A Thought For Life – – –

I heard this quote the other day and it was like a “message” was being sent to me directly.

Family, friends, neighbors, people in general – sometimes they irk you.  You wonder how can they not see it?  You get cranky, you might even think you should “get even” – but what does that solve?  Doesn’t change them, their actions, one bit.

So next time you get REALLY irritated, think of this:

“LOVE ISN’T BASED ON A SCORECARD”

It might help.

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Let’s Try This Again – – –

I’m going to try this again.   For some reason, I copy the link and it just does NOT want to go into my post.   Fingers crossed, I never promised to be “techie”, ha ha!!  But Copy and Paste has always worked in the past.

If it doesn’t work, you can try a Google search for the author:  John P Weiss and it was posted on October 24, 2019.

The does and don’ts of polite conversation are always things to remember, especially these days of people being overly anxious and stirred up.  Thanks for your patience.

 

View at Medium.com

 

 

 

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The Art Of Conversation – – –

My son sent me this a while back.  I’m hoping that it wasn’t necessarily directed at me, but more a share of things that irritate all of us.  Yes, I have some friends that do this, constantly interrupt and not let me finish my thoughts or my sentence.

At least now tho’, I am trying really hard to make sure I’m not also “one of those”.  Polite conversation, after the spring of social distancing we’ve all had, just being together is going to be more important than ever.  Let’s all be more aware of “listening” first.

 

https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0?ui=2&ik=9c114b4ccd&attid=0.1.1&permmsgid=msg-f:1663690015649151240&th=17169d412f21b908&view=att&disp=safe

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Beauty, Not Just In The Eye Of The Beholder – – –

https://vickiarcher.com/2019/10/best-kept-beauty-secrets-q-a-2/

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Final Thoughts For A New Decade #9 – – –

I AM ENOUGH!

So, . . . it’s bolded and capitalized.

Yes I am.

If you’ve never lived or worked or associated yourself with a person or persons who do not think you are enough?  Lucky you.

If you have, I’m sorry.

I have.

It’s taken me a long time to appreciate my worth as a person, as a friend, as a member of a family unit.

How are you feeling today?  Are you feeling like you are enough?  My hopes for all of us is that we continue to put ourselves in the best environments and situations where we are able to realize our full potential, and grow to know we are enough.

As the “social distancing” continues, we’ve been given the gift of time to do more self reflection.  Be safe everyone.

Glow from within my fiends.  You are enough!

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Thoughts For A New Decade #8 – – –

I have the right to express my needs honestly

“Honestly” – that’s an interesting way of putting this thought.  Does not doing it honestly mean you alter those needs because no one around you is going to help fulfill those needs unless you make it easy for them?  Or does it mean you alter your needs to fit their needs, their timing, their opinions of your needs?

Doesn’t it really just mean to be yourself, take care of yourself, and if you need something more from a family member, a friend, a partner you are honest in opening up to them?

My Father used to say that honesty is the best policy.  Bet you heard that one too when you were growing up and learning to be your own person.

If those that you surround yourself are too busy filling their own needs to concern themselves with any of yours, maybe it is time to alter the way you seek to fulfill your personal needs with those same people.  Maybe they are just totally unaware that you need a bit more attention.

And perhaps if you make decisions about those close to you without giving them the opportunity to learn of your needs, and your frustrations, it’s being unfair to them.   Or maybe you need to seek out a more caring and thoughtful group of people to be around.

This one is a tough one.  Lately I have begun to be more vocal in the things I need, seek, in friends and family.  If something bothers me, I’m trying to be more “honest” and open about it, JUST IN CASE those friends and family do not realize.

And then . . . if they chose not to care, I have my answer.

 

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Thoughts For A New Decade #4 – – –

“I don’t have to anticipate the needs of others”

See #3.   ; -)

Seriously, isn’t that what we do when we’re young?  When we’re dating?  When we’re married and then becoming parents?  When we’re planning things with people?

I was/am great at this.  It is the way I was brought up to be.  My Mother was a master at this, and I learned from her very well indeed.  Call it Southern, call it Texan, call it anything you want – I thought of everyone else before I thought of me.

There are times I really miss, as a single person, not having that opportunity to anticipate those needs, especially of family.   So now instead, I employ that particular skill set in my volunteer work, or when planning things with friends.

Sometimes I’ll take a step back and think that others will fill that void, you know, if I’m not doing it then surely they will?  Uh . . . no!

Solution?  Be happy fulfilling your dreams and your needs and let others take care of themselves.

Over the past couple of years I’ve really scaled back.  I’ve released myself from the self imposed obligation to take care of, and anticipate, the needs of others.   Does that make me selfish?  I don’t really think so.  Have they noticed?  Maybe.  Maybe not.  But boy do I have alot more time these days to do the things I dream about.

 

 

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7.  Don’t be afraid to make more time for the right relationships.

7.  Don’t be afraid to make more time for the right relationships.

“Not everyone will appreciate what you do for them.  You have to figure out who’s worth your attention and who’s just taking advantage of you.  If your time and energy is misspent on the wrong relationships, or on too many activities that force you to neglect your good relationships, you can end up in a tedious cycle of fleeting friendships, superficial romances that are as thrilling as they are meaningless, and a general sense of wondering why you always seem to be chasing affection.

Choose yourself rather than settle for those who treat you as ordinary.  YOU certainly aren’t.  Never settle for being someone’s option when you have the potential to be someone’s priority.  You are the sum of the people you spend the most time with.  If you hang with the wrong people too often, they will bring you down.  But if you hang with the right people, they will help you grow into your best self.  These people will love all the things about you that others are intimidated by.”

 

Flashback – it’s like my Mother is sitting here as I write this and I’m typing quickly to get all her words in.

Doesn’t this sound like a lecture/piece of advice we all received in Middle School (OK, it was called Junior High when I was there!) from our parents??

If we’d listened, would we be happier today?  Well, it’s never too late because re-reading that which I’ve shared above is something you cannot do too few times.

I’ve joked that in the past years, I’ve whittled down my Christmas card list to the real people, the true friends.  But that’s just a simple way of saying I know who the best people in my life are now.  And this means either gender in my life, friends and/or family.

Do not accept bad treatment from anyone, do not sink to their level and allow them to bring you down.

You’re worth so much more.

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3.  Don’t be afraid to live your truth.

3.  Don’t be afraid to live your truth.

“Tell yourself, “I am ENOUGH” anytime you begin to feel otherwise.  Accept your flaws.  Admit your mistakes.  Don’t hide and don’t lie.

Deal with the truth—your truth—every step of the way.  Learn the lessons, endure the consequences of reality, and move forward.  Your truth won’t penalize you.  Your mistakes won’t hurt you.  Only your denial and cover-up will.  Flawed and vulnerable people are powerful and strong.  Liars and phonies are not.  Every beautiful human being is made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions and finished with trials and errors.

So keep reminding yourself that you are YOU for a reason, and that the journey is worth it.  Ignore the distractions.  Listen to your own inner voice.  Mind your own business.  Keep your best wishes and your biggest desires close to your heart, and dedicate time to them every day.  Don’t be scared to walk alone sometimes, and don’t be scared to enjoy it.  And don’t let anyone’s ignorance, drama or negativity derail you.”

 

This is really good for me.  For years I let other’s negativity and their need for drama trauma get in the way of being true to myself.  There was nothing wrong with me; I was a valuable person with a big heart and a willingness to always help others.

These days I appreciate and value those qualities in myself.  Sure I have many flaws and have made many silly mistakes.  I’m OK with that, I’m human!

But the important thing I’ve learned?

I AM GOOD ENOUGH!!  Say that to yourself, mean it, embrace it, live it and be thankful everyday for being you!

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