suddenlysinglewomen

Becoming the best version of yourself

8) Positive Thoughts Create Positive Things

Following on the heels of Happiness comes from within, is today’s thought tickle!

Isn’t this just one of those things that sounds so obvious that you wonder why it has to be pointed out?

Isn’t it sad that it has to be?

Especially over the past couple of years in our country, I’ve never seen such animosity and divide.  No one can agree on anything.  What ever happened to my Mother’s old saying, “You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar”?  These days if you’re a fly, you’re just gonna get squashed.

The power of positive thinking can create great change now when we need it most.  Where can it start?  With the person in the mirror!

Go download the John Lennon song “Imagine” and then . . . imagine being positive with everyone you encounter today.

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7) Happiness Is Found Within

I’ve known this one a long time – but it doesn’t make it any easier to accomplish.

I guess I was really a witness to this in my marriage.  When things start to go south, there’s alot of blame being hurled around.  One of those accusations???  “I’m not happy anymore, you don’t make me happy.”

You wanna scream – “It’s not my job!”    But it also isn’t that easy.

In any relationship, you certainly want to do nice things for the other person, to put a smile on their face, to show your love, that you care, that they are important to you.  However, what if that person is so miserable, and can’t see that it starts with him or her?  They may toss your kindness and love right back in your face.  How does that make you feel?

Like not trying anymore.  And so the relationship break down begins.

Don’t let their misery bring you down – let’s hope your happiness is infectious.  Let’s hope that some day they understand that “Happiness Is Found Within”!

 

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4) Things Always Get Better With Time

This is a bit like “It’s always darkest just before dawn!”

Or, “Time, it’s the great healer!”

Eventually . . .

Boy, when I first found out about my husband “living outside the bonds of marriage”, I was devastated.  The reactions from friends were as different as night and day.  The common thread seemed to be, if I elected to stay – things would get better with time.

It sure didn’t seem like it.  And just how much time does it take anyway?

Everyone’s situation is different (just like yesterday’s everyone’s journey is different) and no one can tell you just when your “thing” will get better, but it will.

The passage of time dims the hurt; your life gets back on track with patience.

I’m ten years post divorce now, that’s alot of time for things to get better.  The good news?  They have, and continue to do so.  It may not be the path I thought I’d be on when I got married at 23, but for me at this time in my life – it is the best path.

And things just keep getting better!

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Still Laughing Out Loud!! (i.e. share with your men friends/family)

NINE  
WORDS WOMEN USE
(1)   Fine :   This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2)   Five Minutes :   If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3)   Nothing :   This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4)   Go  Ahead :   This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
(5)   Loud Sigh :   This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6)   That’s Okay :   This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7)   Thanks :   A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm  
and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ . that will bring on a ‘whatever’).
(8)   Whatever :   Is a woman’s way of saying   F–   YOU!
(9)   Don’t worry about it, I got it :   Another  
dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman  
has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it  herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3.
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Sorry I Can’t Take Your Call Right Now . . .

Cleaning out the “draft folder” – it’s full of things I find that grab my attention, and I want to post about them, but just need some time to think on it.  So, I copy and paste, and save to “draft”.

Periodically I go back and edit, and post after fleshing out my thoughts.  Sometimes it just speaks for itself, LOL!  Making those positive changes in your life allows you to walk away from the negative nellies.  Cannot say I’d go so far as the quote below, but it did make me chuckle, and I hope you’ll take it in the fun with which I intend by sharing it with you!

 

Jim’s Daily Awakenings

“I met a remarkable woman the other day who has a unique recorded message on her voicemail.  It says: “This is ___________.  Sorry I missed you.  Leave me a message.  But I need to warn you: I’m making some changes in my life.  If I don’t get back to you, you are one of the changes.”

Let’s face it, many of us could stand to make changes in our lives.  And in order to make these changes, we will need to consider people.

Do you need to add her last two sentences to your voicemail?”

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Just A Reminder – – –

While cleaning off my refrigerator the other day (note to self, double-sided sticky tape is really hard to get off your stainless steel appliances!!) – I finally took down one of my 2017 objectives.

Before it goes into the recycle bin, it bears repeating one more time – because it’s so pertinent to the “new year” and “new beginnings” I’ve been sharing.  So indulge me and let’s run this one by one more time.

A quote by Brigitte Nicole:

Either they like you or they don’t  Never try to convince somebody of your worth.  If a person doesn’t appreciate you, they don’t deserve you.  Respect yourself and be with people who truly value “you”.

Can I hear an AMEN!

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Welcome 2018! My Resolution? Simple – –

Easy?  Nah!  Do-able?  Yeah!

Forget resolving to lose the same 10 pounds, they’re with me for the duration!

Putting a smile on my face and look out, because here I come world . . .

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Part Four – – –

Replace a doubting attitude, with an attitude of faith!

Faith – sometimes you feel like it leaves you.  You begin to doubt everything that you learned growing up, because most likely few of us have the lives today we thought we were going to.

Am I right?

My Father and I had a special relationship.  He was my hero, I miss him every day.  If he said he was going to do something, and the creek didn’t rise, he did it.  You could count on him and I did.  I never had any doubt in him.

Doubt was something that entered my life in college.  Was I good enough?  Was I smart enough?  Would I get a job?  Could I support myself?  He had always been my rock and my foundation making sure to bolster my self confidence and make me believe in myself.

As an adult, doubt enters your life many times – and suddenly your hero isn’t there for you any more.  Others that you depend on let you down, you fell abandoned.  You lose faith in all you were taught to believe in.

I’ve had the chance over the past ten years to face my doubts, and to re-establish my faith, both in people and in my own spirituality.  Don’t get me wrong, people will still let me down.  The difference is now I have the faith to move past those disappointments.  I have the faith that I am going to be alright!

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Approaching the Weekend – – –

I recently had lunch with a new friend, whom I met at my book signing party last year!  We connected through “social media”, and have subsequently found that we have much in common.  It doesn’t hurt that she feeds my ego by telling me how important my book is, and can be, to women.

SCORE!!

She gives it to her clients as a post divorce tool; she specializes in women being financially savvy when they find themselves “suddenly single” after divorce, or even in the case of the death of a spouse.

While she still explores the “hope” of “happily ever after” through dating, I expressed my willingness to “throw in the towel”.  I applaud her for sticking with it, and admit that the occasional hand-holding, hug, and dinner conversation are things that I still long for.  But how do your find that?

Not sure, but in the mean time, when this pic turned up on my FB feed, I took it as a sign . . . that for the mean time . . . it’s OK learning to be alone.  After all, what man is going to let me obsess over The Voice and it’s Finale?

Go Team Lauren!!   : -)

 

 

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Being Authentic To Yourself . . .

Life is hard, we’re challenged every day.  Making the right decision when faced with a dilemma can be tough.  You weigh all your options but at the end of the day, you are best served being true to yourself.

This author calls it being authentic, I call it stressful – but I plan to do more of it in 2017.

Doesn’t really matter if you’re single and alone, or in a relationship and dealing with a partner.  At the end of every day, you are accountable for your decisions and your actions.  Perhaps choosing to be more authentic will shine a light on your future path.

Shut out all the crowd “noise” and listen to that inner voice.

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/13772102

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