That’s right – I’m now inventing words. It’s been fun writing for my blog, getting my feelings out there, knowing that others are actually reading and listening to my thoughts. It’s never been about getting you to necessarily agree with me, but just to listen.
I’m a very symmetric person – yes I’m the one that straightens paintings on the wall. I alphabetize my spices, I load the dishwasher a certain way. I like balance, evenness, routine – things and people I can count on.
In my writing I love alliteration, abbreviations and making up words that just seem to sum it all up. Last night I had the “luv’yabut” epiphany. It explains so many things about relationships. Prior posts have generated comments on this blog about trusting animals more than trusting humans. I know how that feels. Hence the photo included above. So true.
Back to the “luv’yabut” – it’s true definition would be along the lines of, “I love you but . . .” and then add the criticisms or demands. No one ever just likes you for who you are, they want you to change into THEIR version of who you should be. They want you to act the way THEY want you to act.
I love you but . . . I really wish you wouldn’t dress that way, wear your hair that way, do your makeup like that . . .
I love you but . . . I want you to do it my way because it’s better, faster, smarter, simpler, easier, cheaper . . .
I love you but . . . shouldn’t you be eating healthier, less sugar, more protein, veggies and fruit, working out?
I love you but . . . I don’t want to go on that trip, have dinner with that person, visit your parents . . .
I love you but . . . I don’t want you to be friends with that woman, buy a ticket to that event, enroll the boys in camp . . .
I love you but . . . that’s the stupidest idea you’ve ever had . . .
I had a lot of “luv’yabut” in my 30 years of marriage. Now that I’ve been out of it going on 8 years, I look back and realize just how many times I capitulated because it was easier being his version of me, than my version of me.
I still make mistakes, and still do crazy things sometimes – but I own them. Now I live my life for the “luv’yacauz”! Hoping you do too!
suddenlysinglewomen 
Now yer talkin!!!
Sent from my iPad
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