suddenlysinglewomen

Surviving the unwanted divorce

“When Harry Met Sally” – A Classic, But Realtiy?

on November 13, 2013

We all loved that movie.  I’ve watched it multiple times and even own the DVD.  You never know when you might want an uplift right?

But is that movie really based in reality, or is it just Hollywood wishful thinking?  They went from being friends, to having a sexual relationship, to being awkward friends, to falling in love and ultimately getting together (or so it’s implied and we “romantics” would like to think).

I was married for 30 years.  We were 22 and 23 when we got married.  He’d dated a lot and had many relationships, I had not.  When we were together, I had no trouble having fun conversations and sharing activities with men.  I was married, I was safe – there were no expectations.

I now feel very awkward thinking about having men friends.  And I don’t know about you, but I haven’t met many men who WANT to be friends with a single woman.  At my age, most single men are that way for a reason.  Talk about emotionally unavailable?  The last thing on their minds is wanting to have a woman “friend”.  They can have their pick of the litter and they know it.  We single ladies of a certain age?  Not so much!

Even if I have the opportunity to go to a night time event (remember, it’s a couple’s world) I generally refuse the invitation because I can’t find a nice male “friend” to be my companion.  And if there is one, they have no problem with you paying for that event ticket for the two of you.   Rarely is there a “Well hey, then let me take you to dinner!”   They think being seen in public with you implies they are “off the market” or “taken”.  Heaven forbid they should miss out on the next “flavor of the month” if they’re seen as part of a couple, or in a relationship.

If it does however turn into a sexual relationship, do you really think you can stay friends with that man after the intimacy (for whatever reason) is over?  I don’t think so.   You want a friend?  They want sex!  You then expect a relationship or monogamy?  They want space.

I guess this “Sally” just hasn’t met her “Harry” yet.

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One response to ““When Harry Met Sally” – A Classic, But Realtiy?

  1. Farris says:

    That couldn’t be more true. I wish I would have known how truly slim the options would be for single women on the north side of 40. The choices are men who gladly pay for hot 28 year olds or men who want you to pay for your part of the meal in a romantic restaurant. Ugh….

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