suddenlysinglewomen

Becoming the best version of yourself

12) What Goes Around Come Around

Today is our last “thought” and if anything should strike terror into the hearts of the Mean Girls, this is it, LOL!!

Admittedly, when someone “does me wrong”, I do think this thought – alot!  How can you not?

Who knows if it actually happens; who knows if we’ll be around to see it or if we should WANT to see it?

But we’re human . . .

 

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11) You Only Fail If You Quit

I always admired the ad company who came up with the slogan for the Texas Lottery:  “You can’t win if you don’t buy!”

Pretty obvious if you think about it, right?

Well today’s thought is along those same lines of “reason”.

If you don’t at least try, you’ll certainly never succeed but even more than that, a sure fire way to fail is to quit.  Whether this is a goal at work, at home, in your personal life or your family life – you surely will never succeed if you quit.

Having watched all the latest movies reliving WWII it brings to mind:  “Failure Is Not An Option” – so let’s get stoked to succeed by not quitting!

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10) Kindness Is Free

We all want it, but do we all offer it?  And if not, . . . then why not?  It costs nothing.

Giving kindness not only makes the recipient feel better, but not too surprising is that it makes you feel better also!

Try a random act of kindness today and see what happens – I’m betting that you’re going to feel better the rest of the day.   Make it a habit – we’ll all be better for it.

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9) Smiles Are Contagious

‘Nuff said!

: -)

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8) Positive Thoughts Create Positive Things

Following on the heels of Happiness comes from within, is today’s thought tickle!

Isn’t this just one of those things that sounds so obvious that you wonder why it has to be pointed out?

Isn’t it sad that it has to be?

Especially over the past couple of years in our country, I’ve never seen such animosity and divide.  No one can agree on anything.  What ever happened to my Mother’s old saying, “You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar”?  These days if you’re a fly, you’re just gonna get squashed.

The power of positive thinking can create great change now when we need it most.  Where can it start?  With the person in the mirror!

Go download the John Lennon song “Imagine” and then . . . imagine being positive with everyone you encounter today.

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7) Happiness Is Found Within

I’ve known this one a long time – but it doesn’t make it any easier to accomplish.

I guess I was really a witness to this in my marriage.  When things start to go south, there’s alot of blame being hurled around.  One of those accusations???  “I’m not happy anymore, you don’t make me happy.”

You wanna scream – “It’s not my job!”    But it also isn’t that easy.

In any relationship, you certainly want to do nice things for the other person, to put a smile on their face, to show your love, that you care, that they are important to you.  However, what if that person is so miserable, and can’t see that it starts with him or her?  They may toss your kindness and love right back in your face.  How does that make you feel?

Like not trying anymore.  And so the relationship break down begins.

Don’t let their misery bring you down – let’s hope your happiness is infectious.  Let’s hope that some day they understand that “Happiness Is Found Within”!

 

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6) Overthinking Will Lead To Sadness

To me, this is similar to always “looking back” – and the first thought of “the past cannot be changed.”

I overthink things alot – yes, . . . guilty!

And the conclusion I usually come to?  A supreme waste of time.  It doesn’t change anything, and it’s keeping me held back.  Imagine a giant rubber band around your waistline and every step you try to take forward, just yanks you back – sometimes further back than you started.

There will always be things that will make you sad.  Don’t add to that list and bring it on yourself.  It’s spring, the flowers are blooming and it’s all about new beginnings.  Instead of overthinking, when you find yourself doing it, get outside and take a walk and clear your mind of that habit.

And smile!

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5) Judgements Are A Confession of Character

Have you ever heard of the Meyers Briggs Personality Assessment?

If you are ever curious about the reasons behind why you make certain decisions, how you might handle a certain situation or are contemplating a relationship – go do this test!  It’s an eye opener.

I did one years ago, as part of a leadership group I was participating in.  Boy did it open my eyes to some of my personality traits.  What was even MORE eye opening several years later, was after my “then” husband did one for work.  We compared our scores.  It should have been a warning.

I scored very highly on the “judger” judgmental part of the test.  I’d never had that trait identified like that before.   I really had to focus on being more understanding of other’s opinions and personalities and seeing that I could not put how “I” would handle something on them, as an expectation.

I think I have a pretty good character – and most of the time I’m a really good person, but it is still a daily struggle at times to let those judgements go.  What can I say but that I’m a constant work in progress!

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4) Things Always Get Better With Time

This is a bit like “It’s always darkest just before dawn!”

Or, “Time, it’s the great healer!”

Eventually . . .

Boy, when I first found out about my husband “living outside the bonds of marriage”, I was devastated.  The reactions from friends were as different as night and day.  The common thread seemed to be, if I elected to stay – things would get better with time.

It sure didn’t seem like it.  And just how much time does it take anyway?

Everyone’s situation is different (just like yesterday’s everyone’s journey is different) and no one can tell you just when your “thing” will get better, but it will.

The passage of time dims the hurt; your life gets back on track with patience.

I’m ten years post divorce now, that’s alot of time for things to get better.  The good news?  They have, and continue to do so.  It may not be the path I thought I’d be on when I got married at 23, but for me at this time in my life – it is the best path.

And things just keep getting better!

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3) Everyone’s Journey Is Different

So true!

While I was gathering information for my book, and talking to other women about things that had happened in their lives over the years of marriage, successful or not – one thing became very clear.

Everyone’s journey is different.

Things that I initially thought were obvious and universal, became different and unsuspected.  You put 100 people in a room and hand them a set of circumstance and they will all handle it differently.  They are neither right or wrong, just different.

Just like yesterday’s post on opinions, our journeys and forks in the road happen at different times and for different reasons – there is not always a clear right and/or wrong.

Yes, looking back there might be things I would’ve done differently, and my path might have then been different at this point.  There is still no time travel going back to change things.  Having regrets, making amends, moving forward – it is your journey and hopefully you embrace it fully.

Those bumps in the road, the potholes you fall into – they make you who you are.  Special.

Embrace “different” – you only go ’round once!

 

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