suddenlysinglewomen

Becoming the best version of yourself

Do We Need Closer Friendships?

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Beauty, Not Just In The Eye Of The Beholder – – –

https://vickiarcher.com/2019/10/best-kept-beauty-secrets-q-a-2/

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Shouldn’t This Be At Any Age?

https://shar.es/a3dPKB

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Channeling Tim Allen’s “Tool Time”?

What do tools have to do with being a suddenly single woman?  HA!!  If you have to ask you must live in a totally maintenance free high rise.  For the rest of us, all of a sudden we’re having to “maintain” and repair things someone else used to do (or if you were with a non-handy person, you hired it done).  If you want to become more self sufficient, you need help!

Think of the savings from hiring it done, if you just have You Tube and the right tools!  I share this link with you to do a bit of “filling out” from the tool/junk drawer that we all have/had!  Good luck and let’s “get fixin'”!!

 

https://www.realsimple.com/home-organizing/home-improvement/tool-box-essentials?utm_source=emailshare&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=email-share-video&utm_content=20190123

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Final Thoughts For A New Decade #9 – – –

I AM ENOUGH!

So, . . . it’s bolded and capitalized.

Yes I am.

If you’ve never lived or worked or associated yourself with a person or persons who do not think you are enough?  Lucky you.

If you have, I’m sorry.

I have.

It’s taken me a long time to appreciate my worth as a person, as a friend, as a member of a family unit.

How are you feeling today?  Are you feeling like you are enough?  My hopes for all of us is that we continue to put ourselves in the best environments and situations where we are able to realize our full potential, and grow to know we are enough.

As the “social distancing” continues, we’ve been given the gift of time to do more self reflection.  Be safe everyone.

Glow from within my fiends.  You are enough!

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Thoughts For A New Decade #8 – – –

I have the right to express my needs honestly

“Honestly” – that’s an interesting way of putting this thought.  Does not doing it honestly mean you alter those needs because no one around you is going to help fulfill those needs unless you make it easy for them?  Or does it mean you alter your needs to fit their needs, their timing, their opinions of your needs?

Doesn’t it really just mean to be yourself, take care of yourself, and if you need something more from a family member, a friend, a partner you are honest in opening up to them?

My Father used to say that honesty is the best policy.  Bet you heard that one too when you were growing up and learning to be your own person.

If those that you surround yourself are too busy filling their own needs to concern themselves with any of yours, maybe it is time to alter the way you seek to fulfill your personal needs with those same people.  Maybe they are just totally unaware that you need a bit more attention.

And perhaps if you make decisions about those close to you without giving them the opportunity to learn of your needs, and your frustrations, it’s being unfair to them.   Or maybe you need to seek out a more caring and thoughtful group of people to be around.

This one is a tough one.  Lately I have begun to be more vocal in the things I need, seek, in friends and family.  If something bothers me, I’m trying to be more “honest” and open about it, JUST IN CASE those friends and family do not realize.

And then . . . if they chose not to care, I have my answer.

 

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Thoughts For A New Decade #7 – – –

“I have a right to my own feelings”

See #5!   Ha!  JK!

There are alot of similarities, but I think feelings tend to go a bit deeper than opinions.

Feelings can give your emotions a real roller coaster ride.

Any feelings can change at any given moment.  I can be “feeling” really down, and then something really cool happens and the dreary just vanishes.

And vice versa . . .

One of the mantras of my book was having the right to your own feelings.  I also shared how much I detested it (is that too strong?) when people would tell me to just “move on”.  Like . . . really?

We’re all going to have personal feelings that others do not agree with, or understand.   Lest you judge, I’m pretty sure we’ve all been guilty of wondering why/how someone can be so caught up with their emotions and feelings and cannot get over it.

Time, patience, empathy – that’s what you really need, or need to offer.  You have a right to your own feelings, you feel me?

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Day 3 Of “Complying” —

Just saw this on FB and had to share.

Please stay safe out there everyone.  Use your best judgement and we can flatten that curve!

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Thoughts For A New Decade #6 – – –

“I am responsible for my own happiness”

Seriously, how many times have I shared this?  It’s so incredibly simple to grasp, yet hard to put into practice.

Things go wrong, you rant and rave, you question your sanity, your faith, your family and friends . . .

Who’s to blame?  Why do we need someone or some thing to blame?  I’m guilty – I admit it.  Don’t like it, but there it is.  I play the “blame game”.

Sometimes life puts you in a situation that you didn’t ask for, you do not deserve, and is not fair.

How do you get through those times?  Inner strength and being responsible for yourself.   I didn’t ask to be a single woman at this stage of my life.  Yet I have learned to embrace this speed bump in life, and find my inner peace.  I strive every day to be responsible for my spirit’s happiness.

I rise above!

When I was at my lowest post divorce, I knew I had to take charge of my own life, my own recovery and my own happiness.   I found a group of friends.   I wrote.   I learned to blog.   I wrote and published a book.  I blogged some more.  I found new friends, activities, goals.

None of this would’ve happened if that speed bump in my life had not happened.

Embrace your speed bumps as an opportunity to be responsible for your own happiness.  It’s there.

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Thoughts For A New Decade #5 – – –

“Nobody has to agree with me”

In this year of an “election”, boy is this something that resonates on a daily, even hourly basis.  Remember the old rule, don’t talk politics or religion at the table?

How can we help it?  It’s in our face  ALL. DAY. LONG!

It’s to the point of having to “pause” the posts on some of my FB friends (are you wondering if it’s you?); it’s gotten really really ugly.  How can it not?  Look at the example that is being set by leadership.  If they can sling mud 24/7 on the national media, why can’t we?

Because it’s exhausting and just plain rude behavior.  What ever happened to kinder, gentler?

Well, JMHO but it’s really OK to accept that nobody has to agree with you.   It’s your opinion, you have a right to it; I have an opinion too, but please don’t try to change mine.   We don’t have to agree, but the ugliness really needs to stop.

I’m OK you don’t agree with me, you don’t have to.   But I will pause you . . .

 

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