When Someone Says It Better – – –
Then I plan to just “share”. After all, why reinvent the wheel, as they say?? I hope you enjoy this as much as I did, and gather wisdom from her very wise words! Thoughts for a Monday morning!
You Only Live Once . . .
I was recently reading an article in a monthly newsletter and it’s subject matter was certainly something that I have spent hours reflecting upon. As I enter the “senior” time of my life, I look back at all the things I postponed, because of _______________. (Fill in the blank) There always seems to be a good reason, at the time, to put off the adventure I long for.
This article was entitled: “Risk While You Can” and written by Dwight Edwards. Below is an excerpt that I share with you all.
“Not long ago a survey was done among a large group of elderly men and women. The question was asked, “What three things would you do differently if you could live your life over?” They were then given a dozen or so possible answers to choose from. Guess what response ranked number one? “I would have risked more” was the runaway, first place answer.
How interesting! In the twilight of their lives, their greatest regret was not that they hadn’t made enough money, hadn’t visited enough countries, hadn’t made a bigger name for themselves, etc. It was simply that they had played safe too often, had settled for vanilla too frequently, and too easily had chosen the safety of the bench rather than the dangers and glories of being actually out on the field. But they couldn’t escape the lingering regret of shunned risks and forfeited possibilities. Risking always costs; but not risking often costs even more in the long run. Someone put it well:
“There was a very cautious man,
Who never laughed or played;
He never risked, he never tried,
He never sang or prayed.
And when he one day passed away
His insurance was denied;
For since he never really lived,
They claimed he never died!”
Wayne Gretzky, the greatest to ever skate the ice, is exactly right – “You miss 100% of the shots you never take.”
The author’s advice???? “Let’s take the shots!”
Finances – You Gotta Have A Plan!
The other day, I was perusing articles of similar content to my blog, and subsequent book. I love being able to share and pass along information to you all when I find something of value!
These two sites seem to hold valuable information when searching for financial planners, etc. Whether your divorce is impending, current or past and “over” – this will always be good information for you to have. Even for those of you still married, someday you may be alone and/or widowed – you still have to know how to make smart decisions. Therefore, I share:
“Dear Liz: Every so often your column mentions an organization that lists financial planners that are fee-only. I cannot find this information on your site. Please keep mentioning this in your column.
Answer: You can get referrals to fee-only planners who charge by the hour at http://www.garrettplanningnetwork.com. If you’re looking for fee-only planners who charge a retainer or a percentage of assets, you’ll find those at http://www.napfa.org.”
Always looking out for you!!
Here’s To Finding “Contentment” . . .
“Today may there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us”.
I believe in some corners this is referred to as the Serenity Prayer. Serenity, contentment, are these things that we can strive for and ever find in our busy lives?
I recently took a Meditation and Happiness class. It was two classes, offered on consecutive Friday evenings at a nearby University. Sure, why not? What else am I doing on a Friday night? Wink Wink . . .
The teacher had been trained by Tibetan Monks, had spent time with the Dali Lama. (Did I spell that right?) He had the lose flowing garments, and looked like a yogi. He had his floor mat and pillow, spoke soothingly, taught us about breathing and releasing the mind. I came closer to “getting it” than I ever have before, but still . . .
His mantra was much shorter than the one above, and focused on seeking “happiness”. I have a friend who refers to it as seeking “quiet”. Semantics.
I do believe that as I get older, it is important for me to move farther away from the frenetic life I used to thrive on, and those people who keep it that way. Therefore, as it says above, I desire to be content with myself, and allow my soul the freedom, and dare I add – joy, to sing, dance, praise and love!
I wish these things for all of you.
Drama Queens??? Who Needs Them??
“There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh. Forget the bad, and focus on the good. Love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don’t. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.”
If getting back up is living, then I am alive and well!
When I was very young, being a child of older parents – I was always around much older adults. There was more than the fair share of cranky old women and men. I never understood why they were always in a bad mood. I was pretty sure it had nothing to do with me, but I wondered what made them that way?
I promised myself then and there that I would not grow up to be a cranky old woman.
Uh Oh!
Now that I myself am an adult, surrounded by other adults – I think I’m beginning to understand. I still don’t want to be “one of them, the cranky ones” – but I’m starting to understand the how and why they got that way. The difference today? I can make a choice to not let it turn me into the same thing. I can remove myself.
When I read the above statement, it was like a very bright light bulb went off in my brain. By nature I am the fixer, the pleaser, the consensus builder – but some people just do not want to be happy. They thrive in their “poor me” land. It’s the way they seek attention. Not this woman. Much like the past post I wrote several years ago about the “bobbin” on top of the water? That’s me, I’m going to pop back up onto the surface.
Scroll back up and read the quote again. Decide to walk away from the Drama Queens (or Kings) in your life. Reside in a place where people make you laugh, and show you respect. It’s hard to walk away, some of these people have been in my life for 30+ years, but they’re weighing me down. I will be the Phoenix rising from the ashes, see me soar!
Changing Your Expectations?
A friend recently shared this little snippet, pretty sure there’s more where this came from so I’ll include the credit and link below should you choose to scope out more! This one tho’, speaks loudly to me. Read it first, then I’ll share my thoughts!
By: Danielle LaPorte at #Truthbombs. http://bit.ly/truthbombs
Truthbomb: “People are going to be who they are most of the time. In character, not out of character. We are — for better or for worse — generally predictable. So there’s a lot of sanity in just flowing with someone’s nature. Accept it. Forgive it. Just tolerate it. Or peace out if you don’t want it in your life. But don’t waste too much time trying to change it.”
Not long ago I was sharing something I’d read with a group of my GF’s. I was commenting on how very sad it is that advice these days tells us if we don’t want to be disappointed in people, we should “lower” our expectations. That just goes against everything I was taught and shown as a child of the 50’s.
Later, as a teacher, I was constantly reminded that my students would live up to my expectations. If I didn’t expect much from them, they would give me just that – not much. If I expected really good things from them, and held them to a high standard, they rarely let me down.
As I grow older in this 21st century, I am sad to report tho’ that a lot of people just don’t give a “sh*t” about what you think about them or their actions. According to the quote above, I’m just supposed to tolerate it.
My biggest mistake I have found, is expecting people to handle situations the same as I would. Politeness and good manners – what happened to them? Everyone is so focused on their own needs, that thinking of others first, has disappeared. That is a very sad state of affairs.
So maybe it’s time for me to take the last line above to heart, and not waste too much time trying to change it, or the people around me? I’ll just be content to know that I will continue to put other’s needs first, knowing that I am no saint – but I am polite, have good manners and will continue to be so.
Lesson #41
“No matter how you feel, get up, dress up, and show up.”
I will if you will!
Seriously, as I write this I’m sitting in my bathrobe still, with both dogs asleep on my feet.
How easy is it for us to “cancel”, to not show up, to live the day in our workout clothes (whether we actually work out or not)? Too easy for me. I need to quit asking myself the question, “Do I really have to?”
Yes I do!
Our mothers got up, dressed up and showed up.
OK – off to shower . . .
Lesson #34
“Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.”
I love this lesson. This is right up my alley. If I had to work in an inside office cubicle I think I’d wither up.
Getting outside allows you time to think and breathe and take in the beauty of the world. Granted, freakish storms can keep you inside but in general, you should be able to get outside of your house, your office, your comfort zone.
Oxygen is vital to our existence, it’s vital to our brain to operate. For years artists have painted beautiful landscapes that draw you into their beauty and pastoral settings. Being outside makes me happy and even when I’m stuck in traffic I try to look around for the unusual or the beautiful. (People can do some pretty hilarious looking things when they’re in their cars and think no one is watching!) Not encouraging you to be a voyeur, but when they’re jiving to the radio, I try to guess what song they’re listening to. Everyone thinks they’re Jimmy Kimmel!
Take a walk, visit a neighbor, make a grocery or pharmacy run, there seems to be a Starbucks close enough for anyone to walk to. Drive to the park then walk around that park, say hi to someone and smile. Breathe in, breathe out and look for the miracles that are everywhere.
suddenlysinglewomen 