suddenlysinglewomen

Becoming the best version of yourself

It’s Been A While But I’m Still Here!!

What a revelation. On some level, you know it, but do you practice it??

I have been and it’s so FREEING!! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not being mean – I’m just taking better care of myself, my needs, my purpose, my life!!

During this season of Thanksgiving and Holidaze, I feel so ready to take it on. And 2026? Nothing but onward and upward.

From this past September through this coming January I will have made 9 roundtrips on flights; rarely are they on time, but I always get to where I’m going, and so far have made it back home. That’s saying something considering the Fall we had.

So “choose you”! Have a wonderful end of the year and a grand kickoff to the next one.

Holiday Hugs to you!!

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Happy 2025!

Sorry – a day late for my good wishes to you all. There was that “football” game that got in the way, LOL!

So to start the new year off, I’m not making resolutions, just thinking about how to be more proactive in keeping my life positive and moving forward in a happy way this year. Love this and wanted to share!!

Keep happy and keep trying. (and take the title as 10 lessons for all ages!)

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Easier Said Than Done – – –

But so crucial in recovering from past hurts and disappointments. As recommended, I have not read it yet but I’ve added it to my summer list and thought I’d share it here on the blog just in case anyone else is looking to “let go” from past hurts and disappointments.

In “Forgiving What You Can’t Forget” Lysa TerKeurst offers a heartfelt exploration of the journey towards forgiveness, particularly in the face of deep, enduring pain. This book is a beacon for those struggling to move past hurt and betrayal, providing practical wisdom and profound insights into the process of healing. Here are seven transformative lessons from the book that will inspire you to embark on your own path to forgiveness and peace.

1. Forgiveness is a Process, Not an Event

One of the most powerful lessons from TerKeurst’s book is that forgiveness is not a one-time act but an ongoing process. It’s about continually choosing to release resentment and bitterness, even when the pain resurfaces. This perspective was liberating, as it allowed me to be patient with myself, understanding that forgiveness is a journey with ups and downs.

2. Forgiveness is for You, Not for Them

TerKeurst emphasizes that forgiveness is primarily for our own benefit. Holding onto anger and hurt only prolongs our suffering, while forgiveness frees us to heal and move forward. This lesson shifted my focus from the offender to my own well-being, empowering me to reclaim my peace and joy.

3. Honesty with Yourself and God

The book encourages an honest confrontation with our pain and emotions. Acknowledging the depth of our hurt and bringing it before God can be incredibly healing. TerKeurst’s transparency about her own struggles inspired me to be more open about my feelings, leading to a deeper, more authentic healing process.

4. Forgiveness Doesn’t Mean Reconciliation

Forgiving someone doesn’t necessarily mean we need to reconcile with them or restore the relationship to its previous state. This distinction was crucial, helping me understand that setting healthy boundaries is essential for my well-being. It’s possible to forgive and still protect myself from further harm.

5. The Power of Compassion and Empathy

Developing empathy for those who hurt us can be a powerful step towards forgiveness. TerKeurst illustrates how understanding the offender’s perspective and humanity can soften our hearts and make forgiveness more attainable. This lesson taught me to see beyond my pain and consider the struggles and brokenness of others.

6. Letting Go of the Desire for Revenge

TerKeurst speaks to the natural desire for revenge and justice, which often hinders forgiveness. She encourages us to trust that ultimate justice is in God’s hands, allowing us to let go of the burden of seeking retribution. This lesson brought a profound sense of relief and freedom, knowing I could release this heavy burden.

7. Practical Steps for Daily Forgiveness

The book provides practical steps and prayers for incorporating forgiveness into our daily lives. From journaling our feelings to praying for those who have hurt us, these actionable steps made the abstract concept of forgiveness more tangible and achievable. Implementing these practices helped me make forgiveness a daily, intentional act.

BOOK: https://amzn.to/4dGLcQV

You can ENJOY the AUDIOBOOK for FREE (When you register for Audible Membership Trial) using the same link above.

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Words To Live By – – –

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Wise Words . . .

A friend sent this out via FB and it hit at the perfect time for me.

As I begin the long and arduous process of downsizing, cleaning out, then donating or repurposing, listing for resale and consigning, deciding what to keep – this hit the mark.

Believe me, the “Within you . . . all you need!” I pray is true because this is hard. My son says this will be “freeing”. Of course he has a great job with a bright future, a beautiful wife who adores him and three happy and healthy children. I’ll tell him to check back with me in 30 years, LOL!

So just incase you needed a boost today – – – here you go.

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Happiest Of New Years!!

We deserve it. After a year of pandemic, political nastiness and more – I’m exhausted.

Besides that, as if that wasn’t enough, we all had additional things we had to cope with.

For me personally, it was a year trying to probate my Mom’s estate and having it drag on WAY longer than it should have. 14 months later, we’re still dealing with attorney issues – note to self – you WILL get through this.

I also made a huge personal decision to move in 2021. Not just changing houses, but changing states. I have (warning – double negative!) never not lived in this city and state. It’s 50% exciting and 50% terrifying. It felt like the right decision, but the closer it gets – I begin to have doubts. Or . . . am I just scared? People do it all the time . . .

Cleaning out has begun. Normally in a new year, I get organized, even more so than normal. I clean out, donate, repurpose, start again. This year will be much more “final”. When I think back over all the changes since my divorce, the really large ones have seemed to be forced upon me. I kept my chin up and powered through.

This time it feels different. This time it feels even more forced. This time it will be harder to keep my chin up because my beautiful “freedom and new beginnings” home that I built and moved into post divorce . . . will be gone. It was my statement of surviving being “suddenly single”. It was my statement of independence. It was my statement of being “out from under” the thumb of control. It was showing my children that “I got this”!

I know I’ll be OK. I know there are folks out there who are suffering from much bigger things than what I complain about, but it still is very real to me. It’s why you haven’t heard from me as consistently as you used to. Processing all of these changes during normal times is hard. 2020 has been a train wreck.

I will get through it, we all will get through it. I have my first “vaccine” next week, that’s a step in the right direction. While the clean out continues, my kids would like some of my things, that’s a happy thing – I can visit them, LOL! A bit of me will live on in their homes. I got to start my grand daughter in riding lessons – my passion passed to a new generation.

I’ll list the positives, and I’ll pray for all of us that 2021 becomes the year of kinder and gentler, of health and prosperity, of believing that all human and animal lives are important. Happy New Year to each of you.

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“That’s A Given” – – –

Well, you haven’t heard from me for a while. Most of the summer I think we were all trying to figure out the “new normal”, if in fact we can even use the word “normal”.

I’ve lost people from the “dam”demic; I’ve been exposed twice but never came down with it. Does this make me feel like just holding my breath? Yes, so right.

Did the whole election process throw us for a loop on top of the health crisis? Yes, more than ever. Are we looking for a leader to lead, regardless of party affiliation? A clear winner? GOOD LUCK WITH THAT!

I vote for a soccer Mom, they get the job done.

A friend forwarded the video from years ago of “We Are The World”. I tried to connect it to this post – SIGH! Technologically challenged today. The whole WordPress.com site has changed their format so – it will take me a while to get comfortable with it again. I don’t like change . . . “That’s A Given”.

The sentiment in that song from yesteryear is still the same. We Are The World – and we can do a better job. And it starts with me/you/us.

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After Last Night’s Presidential Debate – – –

I don’t know many people who didn’t watch it . . . so I’ve been holding this post for a time I thought was appropriate, and after last night, I think it’s “time” to share.

No matter your political leanings, IMHO, last night was a circus, and not in a fun way.  Today I search for a kind of peace that may not be possible, but this tidbit shared with me by my buddy Diva J is certainly needed.

I hope you too can find some peace amongst the chaos that has been 2020.

 

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Fun “Differences” – – –

There is no doubt, this has been “one of those years” and I’m pretty sure we’re ready for it to “move on”!  So while we are being made painfully aware of all our racial, gender and political differences, I share below a fun list . . . of differences.

It’s relevant in my own extended family, over the pronunciation of the word “Aunt”.  How many of these have you run across?

https://www.wordgenius.com/14-words-youll-say-differently-depending-on-where-you-are-in-the-u-s/Xr0yWBPAJQAG8w-R?utm_source=blog

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Love When My Followers “Share”! Thanks Diva J

I want to age like sea glass.
Smoothed by tides,
but not broken.
I want my hard edges to soften.
I want to ride the waves
and go with the flow.
I want to catch a wave
and let it carry me
to where I belong.
I want to be picked up
and held gently by
those who delight in my
well earned patina and
appreciate the changes I went
through to achieve that beauty.
I want to enjoy the journey
and always remember that if
you give the ocean something
breakable it will turn it into
something beautiful.
I want to age like sea glass.

~ Bernadette Noll ~

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